Henrietta's Dream

Henrietta Spink is a remarkable woman and has an exceptional story to tell.

This book is much more than an account of caring for two children with severe disabilities. It reads like a cross between a must-read novel, and a horror story, as we share the lows and highs of the Spink family. The low points are shattering and the highs unimagined, as they include a huge win on the pools and even a royal interest when Henrietta somehow found the energy and the time to start the Henry Spink Foundation.

But before that came about, we read about the birth of their first child - who passed all the early tests - and so Henrietta found herself at home caring for a new baby whose eyes remained shut. Immediately we are plunged into her world, ‘the loneliness of holding and feeding a baby who never looked at me was unbearable’. Voicing her concerns she found most friends avoided saying anything - a deafening silence which so many parents of a child with special needs will recognise. The struggle to get some answers - any answers - goes on and on. Eventually a G.P. announced ‘brain damage’ and a senior paediatrician agreed there was a problem - but ‘wait one year to see how he develops’. Again, a scenario which will be all too familiar to parents who are certain that there is ‘something’ not quite right with their baby and who are desperate for some guidance. Henrietta describes ‘drowning in a sea of terror’.

A miscarriage and then the birth of a second son and the immediate discovery of his very severe birth disabilities makes for harrowing reading. But nothing can prepare the reader for the account of the following years where the parents fought tooth and nail to get help - any help - for their two very disabled sons.

No stone, including consulting with a psychic, is left unturned. And who can blame the Spinks for clutching at any straws when they felt so neglected by the medical advice on offer. Meanwhile they were at the same time caring for their boys all day, every day, and throughout the night. How these parents found the strength, both mental and physical, to go on is an astounding feat. Fortunately the marriage has survived, unlike so many of those of parents with children with special needs, which are torn apart by the unrelenting stress..

The Spinks’ battle year in and out with their local authority, Wandsworth, defies belief. The reader will be left open-mouthed with shock at their treatment.

Henrietta Spink says her children have turned her into a warrior. And her account of the battles she has had to fight will strengthen other parents and grandparents who have an ongoing struggle to provide medical care or appropriate education for their children. Henrietta is not ashamed to tell of the times she wept with exhaustion, disappointment, and sheer rage - but even in her darkest moments she held on to her dream that one day both her boys would be well. Much of her strength comes from this belief.

Do read this book

published by Hodder & Stoughton
£12.99   ISBN 034083157X

and is available from