Talking to Tweenies

Getting it right before it gets rocky with your 8-12 year old

What a brilliant idea for this author to focus on parenting the 8 -12-year-olds. Adolescence starts earlier with every generation, but perhaps never quite so fast as over the past few years. The thirteen-year-old of a generation ago is now the eleven-year-old of today. So how are we, as parents, grandparents and carers to shift in our attitude, and is it right that we should?

Does giving this age group the name of ‘tweenies’ mean that they can be exploited by the advertising industry? Or are they already being shamelessly targeted? Identifying this age group as‘tweenies’ gives these children some kind of power. It raises the expectations of the kids. So where do parents draw the line? We must establsih differences between eight-year-olds and a twelve-year-olds.

And there is a lot of truth in what Harley-Brewer says when she cautions parents ‘to stay close while beginning to let go. It’s hard to reel back freedom, so if we let them have too much of what they want too soon we may have little authority left to monitor, supervise and guide during adolescent exploration and risk-taking.’

Children have always been in a hurry to grow up and to do grown-up things, but unfortunately it does seem as if ‘being a child’ nowadays is something to be ashamed of and to cast off as soon as possible.

Harley-Brewer grasps the nettle in the right way and I believe she lays down sensible and workable guidelines for parents bombarded by tweenies who complain that,‘Everyone is doing/having/going....!’ What makes a difference is that today the media is on the side of the kids and push the latest ‘must-haves’ in a way unthinkable even a decade ago. If you are concerned about your ‘in-between child’ in areas about discipline, morals, manners, friendship or more, you will find a lot of useful advice in this book.

So here you have it: a clear explanation of what these children want and how, as adults who care about them, we can make sure we don’t hold them back, but neither should we let them rush through a key stage of childhood.

published by Hodder Mobius
£10.99     ISBN 0340734418

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